凌晨三点钟。睡不着的晚上，再10个小时就要搭飞机，继续下半部的悠长旅行。究竟是什么让自己眼睁睁望着天花板却怎么也无法入睡？可以像个中学生那样拥有三个星期的长假，应该是开心的才对。为什么内心还是如此地纠结个没完没了。
忽然很抗拒再次回到岛上。忽然很想把假期延续下去永远不必回来面对工作。
躺在床上，不知不觉就想着白天和老板开会时讨论的事情。想着那些想说却没说出口的事。我知道一切不容易。也知道一切都需要时间。却也渐渐组织出辞职信的内容。我很想留下。但我也看见了自己能力的底牌。说我懦弱也好。我都承认。
想起过去犯过的错。一件一件压在身上。我已经不是当初的我。也许我赚了经验，但我却无法再如过去一样无所畏惧地往前冲。我开始退缩。我开始看不见希望。关于brandon，也许我会再次看错。但我却很想坚持。
最近在看的书是《吃苦才是王道》和《倒带人生》。碰巧说的都是游民，流浪汉，收容所等低下阶层的故事。
最近看了很多很多的电影。除去电影院内的《Expendable 3》《The Guardian of Galaxy》《Step Up 5》《The Fault In Our Star》，还在电脑看了《深夜遇见苏格拉底》《The Dallas Buyer Club》《Her》《Yes Men》等。
了不起的故事。触动人心的故事。只是都是他人的故事。
自个儿的故事依旧一团造。
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