為了想要得到自由,我在我身上插上翅膀
飛過高山,飛過河流,才發現我的自由全都只是想像
其實我都一直在逃避,逃避全世界最難以面對的自己
I just want to get away from me
I just want to get away from me
如此而已
飛過高山,飛過河流,才發現我的自由全都只是想像
其實我都一直在逃避,逃避全世界最難以面對的自己
I just want to get away from me
I just want to get away from me
如此而已
[张悬]自由
第一次听见张悬的名字,是在学院生的那一段期间。那一年是几年前。我不记得。我只记得,学院以后的生活是如此地漫长。而那缓慢流逝的时间,不如嗑药,却好似毒药那样缓慢地荼毒着缠满大脑的神经。高潮的期限并没有明确的日期。你只能当一只瞎子,摸索前行着。无论前方是光明还是黯然,你都不知道。你能做的也只有呼吸着周遭的温度。明天吗?谁又能给一个准确的答案了。
七月的那些日子,暖暖地,也蓝蓝地。有人这样说着,也许现在你是这一个模样,未来,你却不可能维持着同一个模样生活着。也有人这样说,有一天,我要为自己的生活做自己想做的事情。当周遭的每一个人都如是地说着的时候,我的脑袋开始当机了。关于生活这回事,不是说听着五月天大声地唱着约翰蓝侬就能把大量的勇气给传进那奄奄一息的躯壳内。
可惜我是鲸鱼。我是个每天只会看动漫玩电脑游戏浑浑浊浊过日子的一个人。就算插上了翅膀我也不会飞翔。太阳可以晒黑我的皮肤,然后脱皮,却没能把深沉的那一颗心给照亮。因此需要《eternal sunshine inside a spotless mind》这类的超写实电影来平衡着那过于现实的生活。也许现实不能如此强制性地删除着不想再拥有的记忆。也许正因为如此我们才不会这样强烈地感受着那些有的没的好的坏的点滴,才能交织出最重要的回忆。
也许没有明天,生命的厚度才不会如此空荡荡地进行着。
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